This Is Albert Quimm

Wrapping my fingers around the knob, I heaved the door open with unexpected force, causing me to tumble violently into a group of students taking a smoke break below the fire escape. Old bones cracking, I stood up and brushed myself off, trying to ignore the sea of poisonous glares coming from all sides. The dark haired boy nearest me was the first to speak.
"Principal Quimm...what are you doing here so late?" This was Jarvis Bennet. I knew his name, because I was fucking his mother.
"Are you ok?" spoke a young woman with dyed green hair. She casually dropped her smoldering cigarette behind her and stepped on it. The others in the group did the same.
"Yes, thank you. I'm fine. No need to worry. Would..." I could feel my face turn red as I extended my hand, "Would somebody be so kind as to help me up?" Jarvis complied and pulled me to my feet. I stood there for a moment, catching my breath. It was silent. Somewhere far away, a dog barked.
"Mr. Quimm, do you...sleep here?" Jarvis again. Behind him, a lad with a pierced nose stifled a laugh.
"Do I sleep here? Of course I don't sleep here!" I insisted, though it was a lie. "I was working late! Say, what are all you kids doing here after hours! Campus is closed!"
"Um, we were just leaving," said green-haired girl. The others hastily nodded in agreement.
"Well good."
Again, a moment of uncomfortable silence. I could sense the kids were waiting for me to leave, so they could continue smoking and god-knows-what else.
"Uh...Professor," began Jarvis, his voice cracking awkwardly, "Do you...have you been hanging around my house? I thought I saw your car in the driveway the other night..."
My heart leapt into my throat and delayed my response. Another boy in a hoodie snorted, but the green-haired girl elbowed him in the gut.
"Well, Mr. Bennet...I..." I began, but quickly changed the subject. "...I will buy you all beer if you promise to go home and never smoke on school property."
The snorting boy snorted once more, and received another jab in the stomach.
"Or, I could have you all expelled. Your choice."

* * *

Several minutes later, I was carrying sacks of assorted liquor out of the 7-Eleven and handing it to a group of underage students in a rusty green Mazda.
"Now...you kids enjoy yourselves...don't tell anybody! And remember our deal."
The carload of students nodded their heads excitedly, and sped off into the night.
"That was almost too easy," I laughed to myself. Zipping up my winter coat, I began the six block journey back to the school. I also had plans for the remainder of the evening.
Finally, returning to my office, I waved to the night janitor, unlocked the door and slipped inside. Sitting down, I loosened my tie and picked up the phone. After three rings, a voice.
"Hello?"
"Hello...Ms. Bennet? This is Albert Quimm..."